Funny Little Saying's

This page is dedicated to those Funny Little Facebook Posting, Text Messages, Twitter Post, or things my Son, Husband or Friends say to me.  Enjoy!

Dirty dishes prove I feed my family, full trash can means I clean up after their messes, messy floors mean I let my children have fun, pile of unfolded laundry means I keep my family in clean clothes, wet bathroom means I bathe my kids! So the next time you walk into my house and see a "mess" think twice before you judge. If you come over to see us, come on in...if your coming over to see my house please make an appointment. Keep this going if you're a parent with a sometimes less than spotless home! :-) Stole this from my Friend Emily's facebook page. 
When we remove what we don't need, we make room for what we want. Our dreams need room to grow. – Stole this from my friend Nikki who found on Smead Organomics. 
Lost my helmet ate all my what?
 "Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Don't settle. As with all matters of the heart, you'll know when you find it."
"Your time is limited so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma, which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary." ~ Steve Jobs

“Here’s to the crazy ones, the misfits, the rebels, the troublemakers, the round pegs in the square holes… the ones who see things differently — they’re not fond of rules… You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them, but the only thing you can’t do is ignore them because they change things… they push the human race forward, and while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius, because the ones who are crazy enough to think that they can change the world, are the ones who do.”~Steve Jobs
The only people you need in your life are the ones that need you in theirs!
 From my friend Mom in Management: Being a grown up sometimes means putting a smile on your face when your entire world is crashing down around just happens.
It takes allot of Finess but sometime BullShit wins the gig!!!
Everybody wants to save the earth; nobody wants to help Mom do the dishes....From my nephew Ben's Facebook status.

AACCHOO!!!........٩(-̮̮̃•̃)۶..If you're allergic to bullcrap, drama, head games, liars, & fake people, keep this sneeze going.........
Run like a fat kid chasing the ice cream truck~ Ashley Stifter (from Steph's Facebook Status)
The Good Lord made Morning People....Clearly I am not ment to be one of them! 
From My Cousin Chrissy Facebook wall...
‎"When things look bad I just remember I've got big breasts and things seem much better

 From Steph's facebook wall....This Summer Be yourself, don't be fake Jump in a pool, maybe a lake Go and meet someone new Do something you would never do Do something good, like have laughFix up the heart torn in halfDon't fake a smile Just enjoy it for a while Wipe away the tearsThink of past yearsLive life while you can Take joy by the hand Turn on music, listen to the sound Turn it up, and dance aroundSee your dreams, just one reach Run across the sandy beach He's the one, fall in love Your thoughts are only right above Every cloud has a silver lining You are already shining Have a blast Forget the past Make this summer one to last

Life is too short to wake up with regrets.Love the people who treat you right.Forget about the ones who don't.Believe everything happens for a reason. If you get a second chance, grab it with both hands. If it changes your life, let it. Nobody said life would be easy. They just promised it would be worth it.
 Pessimists say that the cup is half empty, optimists say that the cup is half full...I say that either way it's not going to be enough coffee.
"I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." ~ Marilyn Monroe
You know what they say about good things coming to those who wait...Well its True!
Wants to know...Do you make mountains out of molehills because you're perfect, ignorant, or stupid?
The power of negative thinking is hard to resist. It's like a snowball running down the mountain.
Do you ever feel like you have what it takes to take on the world, and make real change, but you must make dinner first then do laundry?
INSTALLING SPRING... ███████████████░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ 44% DONE. Installation failed. 404 error: Season not found.

Im turning of of real life drive and I'm hitting easy street with mud tires...from my son's Facebook status

You DO NOT have bigger balls than me... mine just had to be put on my chest to avoid chafing! lol...Stolen from my Auntie Guckie's FB Status!

I have tattoos, so I'm a trouble maker. I have curves, so I'm fat. If I wear makeup, I'm fake. If I say what I think, I'm a bitch. If I cry some times, I'm a drama queen. If I have guy friends, I'm a slut. If I stand up for myself, I'm mouthy. Seems like you can't do anything nowadays without being labeled. So what, go ahead and label me, see if I give a crap..FROM MY FRIEND ANGIE
While emailing my BFF Carrie she said.....I feel like I am in a boat that is filling with water and all I have is a little cup to get rid of it so I don’t drown… 

From my Twitter Friend @JaneofAustralia :
It is so important to not live in another's shadow but cast your own. Not easy to do but worth the effort.

Life is a great big canvas, and you should throw all the paint on it you can. :-) 

 Also from Doug:
Dear Life,I am working hard, here. Please just throw me a fracking bone 

From my Couisn Doug: Duck Duck Gray Duck. MN strong. Just so happens the rest of the world plays it wrong. 

I hate it when it rains on my parade....I just hope there is a pot of gold waiting for me when the storm is over! 

Women are like phones: They like to be held, talked to, and touched often. But push the wrong button and your ass is disconnected. 

ALL women are angels ... And when someone breaks our wings, we simply continue to fly ... On a broomstick ... We are flexible like that ... 

From my Son's FB Status: "if bieber is a fever, let CCR be the cure" I knew I raised him right!

Husband needs a naked room...So we don't have to see his his wrinkly ball sack. :-o Did I just say that...Told him he could use kids drum room!

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.Living one day at a time;Enjoying one moment at a time;Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it;Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will.....Written by Gretchen

There comes a time in life when you have to let go of all the pointless drama and the people who create it & surround yourself with people who make you laugh so hard that you forget the bad and focus solely on the good. After all life is too short to be anything but happy. 

im going live my life to the fullest and be happy doing it if your not going to be there to support me dont even wast my time its only your loss ....Words to live by from my son.

 The waiting game just sucks! Hurry up already!
The old saying, Rumor can run around the world before the truth has got its boots on ...Stolen from my Son's Facebook Status.

Throwing stones only gives your enemies ammunition.

if you tick me off and i don't say anything, it's not because you win.. it's because if i open my mouth I'm going to regret what comes out. Any questions?...from my friend Kris

There's probably many times this year when I disturbed, pestered ,irritated, bugged you or just got on your nerves. Suck it up cupcake, no change planned for 2011! From My Friend Angie

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,The courage to change the things I can, and The wisdom to know the difference. 

God grant me the serenity to.. oh screw it, can i just have a gun in working order and the correct ammunition......Kari A

I don't need a angel on my Christmas tree....I already have one in heaven looking down on me........Aunt Guckie

"Opportunities don't knock, they whisper. So shut up and LISTEN." - Thomas Leonard

" In the words of Big Bird, today's episode was brought to you by the letters                                     "W" "T" and "F"!

From my BFF: ..."You can't get to where your going by holding on to who you have been...stop looking back unless you intend on going that direction!"

How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours. ~Wayne Dyer

From my Aunite Jean “Life is like an onion; you peel off one layer at a time and sometimes you weep.” -- Carl Sandburg

@Girlfriendology: "It's the little things we do & say that mean so much as we go our way."  #quote Willa Hoey 
Per my Auntie Guckie: "Sometimes your knight in shining armor is just a retard in tin foil :-)"

From My BFF: A good friend will come bail you out of jail, but a true friend will be sitting next to you saying...'Damn, that was fun!”

Most things you worry about never happen.

For non-pet owners who visit and like to complain about our pets: 1. They live here, you don't. 2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. That's why they call it 'fur'-niture. 3. I LOVE MY PETS BETTER THAN I LIKE MOST PEOPLE. 4. To you, they are animals. To me, they are kids who are short, hairy, walk on all fours and love me unconditionally.

I'm not a Tree hugger...tress are for traction! 
Lesson One: Open your eyes and read the bottle your husband gave you in the shower when you were asking for Shampoo.

I think that they should just cancel today....really who would care if we missed Tax day?

Life is short....stop, take a look around, be thankfull for all the wonderful people in your life and let them know how much you love them.

I wish Heaven had a phone so I could hear your voice again. I thought of you today, but that is nothing new. I thought about you yesterday, and days before that. I think of you in silence, I often speak your name. All I have are memories and a picture in a frame. Your memory is a keepsake,from which i'll never part. Go...d has you in his arms. I have you in my heart.

Life is short, Break the rules, Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly, Love truly, Laugh uncontrollably, And never regret anything that made you smile..

Chocolate may not sooth the soul....but it sure tastes good!!!!

Tough girls come from New York. Sweetgirls, they're from Alabama. But Minnesota girls, we have fire and ice in our blood. We can ride four-wheelers, be a debutante, throw left hooks, and hunt with the boys, all while wearing shorts and winter coats in the same week! And lord knows if we have an opinion, YOU ARE GOING TO HEAR IT!

PROMISE TO MY CHILDREN: I will stalk you, freak out on you, lecture you, drive you crazy, be your worst nightmare, embarrass you in front of your friends, hunt you down like a bloodhound until the day you understand why I do it. Then I will know you are a responsible adult. All because I LOVE YOU you will never find someone who..loves you & cares about you more than your mom!

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